(NOTE: This article is a roughly edited version of an audio tape I recorded two years ago. Over the last few years I have worked with individuals who struggle with the problem of pornography addiction. The recording was made basically “off the top of my head” so the organization is not the best nor is it all-encompassing. It has religious overtones because it was intended to use in counseling members of my church. Pornography, in my opinion, is one of the ultimate Self Mastery destroyers. What follows is the text from my recording with very little editing.)

My intent is to give counsel to a person who has a problem with pornography. If a person came to me and was having struggles with pornography and wanted very much to stop, but was having difficulty with it – what would my counsel be to that person? That is the purpose of this article. So I am going to direct this article as if I were talking to you.

How Do You Begin?

Many solutions to this problem go into great detail about internet and computer technology and the use of filters and other similar methods to block out the unwanted content. Dealing with the technology and installing safeguards are important, but if someone really wants to find pornography they will find a way – it doesn’t even have to be on the internet. So the real goal would be to take away all desire for it in the first place. Read the rest of this entry »

What if I could show you a way to overcome the biggest obstacles in your life that was totally different than the advice you get everywhere else – and what if it really worked? I’m talking about obstacles such as smoking, drinking, anger, overeating, staying up too late, bad relationships or even drug and pornography addictions. Think for a moment about the biggest obstacle that is holding you back in your life. Think about how you’ve been dealing with it. What I want to present today is a better approach to eliminating it from your life.

Read the rest of this entry »

I talked earlier about the concept of Threshold, of reaching a boiling point in your life, of hitting rock bottom and realizing you need to change. But after that, then what? Where do you go from there? Many people have reached that point and they say, “I’m going to make a change, I’m going to turn over a new leaf.” But, you know, they go to bed, they get up the next day, and life goes on and nothing really changes. Well, that’s a good point. Where do you go from there?

Focus on what you want, not on what you don’t want

I think many times we focus on the bad habit or behavior that we want to change and that’s where our mind is, that’s where our attention is, that’s where the vision is, the pictures that we have in our mind. Now I’ll go back to the example of the person who overeats. You know they say, “I’ve got to change, I’ve got to go on a diet, I’ve got to quit eating the food.” They put all of their focus on not eating and they are constantly thinking about food, saying things to themselves like; “I can’t eat the chips and salsa. I can’t eat the chocolate cake in the fridge. I’ve got to count calories.” Their whole focus is all on food, and not eating the food. Read the rest of this entry »

Epiphany - I’m not sure of the definition but I think it has to do with an “Ah ha!” moment when you learn something new or understand something for the first time. I feel like I’m having one today.

Right now, as I write this, I’m on top of a mountain, taking a day to be alone to think and to meditate.

A depressing discovery

Let me back up a little. I took some time yesterday to try and come up with a plan for change. As I went through years and years of my files containing goals and lists of changes I wanted to make I became very depressed. I saw a pattern of doing the same thing over and over and never making any real progress. For a brief moment as I sat at my desk at home I just felt like giving up, like it was a losing battle that I’ll never get a handle on. Read the rest of this entry »

Good morning! Today I want to talk about an interesting phenomenon that actually happened this morning. It has to do with your mind’s ability to block out what it’s not interested in and only let in what it is trained to let in.

What brought this up was what happened this morning when my alarm went off. I have to admit that I hit the snooze button and jumped back in bed to sleep for 10 more minutes. I actually set my alarm 10 minutes earlier than when I plan to get up. So I lay back in bed and slept a little longer. When my alarm went off again and when I woke up I noticed that my wife was already out of bed. She wasn’t there. She had already gotten up to go wake the boys so they could do their paper route.

I thought it was interesting that I didn’t hear her alarm at all. We both have alarm clocks. They are very similar. They each have a red digital readout and their alarms sound very similar. It’s that annoying beep beep beep sound that today’s alarm clocks typically make. The sounds of the two alarm clocks aren’t that different really. They aren’t exactly the same but very similar. I thought it was interesting that my mind, my brain, is trained to hear my alarm clock and not hers. Her alarm didn’t wake me up but mine did. I thought it was interesting that I hear mine but I don’t hear hers. How can that be?

It makes you wonder about what else in life we don’t see or hear because of what our minds have been trained to see or hear. There is a story I once heard that helps us understand this phenomenon.

WE HEAR WHAT WE LISTEN FOR

Two men were walking along a crowded sidewalk in a downtown business area. Suddenly one exclaimed: ‘Listen to the lovely sound of that cricket.’ But the other could not hear. He asked his companion how he could detect the sound of a cricket amid the din of people and traffic. The first man, who was a zoologist, had trained himself to listen to the voices of nature. But he didn’t explain. He simply took a coin out of his pocket and dropped it to the sidewalk, whereupon a dozen people began to look about them. ‘We hear,’ he said, ‘what we listen for.’ –Kermit L. Long, taken from ‘The Three Boxes of Life,’ by Richard Bolles

We hear what we listen for. What are our minds trained to hear? What are out eyes trained to see? What are we conscious of and what are we unconscious of? What are we paying attention to and what are we not paying attention to? Read the rest of this entry »

This is part 6 of my 6-part series of articles on the Law of Attraction. Previously we talked about there being a law. We called it the Law of Attraction, we called it faith, we called it the law of Like Begets Like, or Like Attracts Like. Just as a seed will reproduce itself, your thoughts will reproduce themselves and attract the things you think about.

Where do you begin?

So what does that mean? Let’s say a person is fairly miserable because their life isn’t going so good. They might say to themselves, “Well, that’s all fine and dandy but what does that mean to me? What am I supposed to do? How do I make that happen in my life?” Read the rest of this entry »

This is part 5 of my 6-part series of articles on the Law of Attraction. Today I want to explore the Law of Attraction within the realm of science. I’ll be the first to admit that I’m no scientist. But I think we can explore the Law of Attraction using reason and logic and come to understand the possibilities of how it works within the world of science. Read the rest of this entry »

This is part 4 in my 6-part series of articles on the Law of Attraction. Today I want to show how the Law of Attraction involves two creations – a mental creation and a physical creation.

When you read the Bible and you read about God creating the universe, it talks about how the word was spoken and it came about. When you speak a word you have to think about it first. It exists in your mind first. Therefore the universe and this world were first created in the mind of God before the elements were ever brought together to create this world physically. Read the rest of this entry »

This is part 3 in my 6-part series on the Law of Attraction. Today I want to discuss examples of the Law of Attraction working in different people’s lives. I’m sure as I give these examples you can think of real people you know that fit these descriptions. Now, I can’t read minds and neither can you. But when you think of people in your life, people that you are intimately acquainted with, you generally know what these people think about on a regular basis by what they say and do. I think we can agree on that. So here are my examples: Read the rest of this entry »

I began this series of articles on the Law of Attraction by explaining the law in terms of my belief in God and how the Law of Attraction works through Him. You can read about it here: The Law of Attraction Part 1 – My Take.

Today I want to take on the idea that the Law of Attraction has been some big secret throughout the ages and only known by a few select people. I knew that wasn’t so. To prove it I did a simple thing and went to my own personal library at home. I examined a number of my books looking for references to the Law of Attraction. I was amazed at what I found. If the Law of Attraction was a secret it certainly was one of the poorest kept secrets I have encountered. Read the rest of this entry »