handholdfemale

Years ago I used to have regular Father’s Interviews with each of my children. I was thinking lately that I ought to start doing that again with my three youngest children who are still at home. Well, this morning I read an entry in my journal about the first time I had Father’s Interviews with my children and it was quite amusing and interesting. It convinced me that I need to start that practice again in my home. Here is the journal entry. Read it and tell me what you think:

Sunday May 23, 1993

I decided this afternoon to have personal interviews with the kids each month starting today. So one-by-one I had a visit with my three oldest children. I’ve been wanting to do this for a long time.

What a delight it was to visit with each of my children. First I spent some time telling them what I liked about them.

I told Erika I liked the way she played with Neil and Bryce and how she tries to be fair with them. I told her how pleased I was with her piano playing. I told her I liked how she did her chores so good and fast.

I told Neil I liked the way he took care of Kimberly and loves her so much. I told him I loved it when he smiles. I told him how I thought he was very coordinated and could do things well like ride his bike or do flips on the tramp.

I told Bryce how I liked how he is always so loving and how he comes up to me and hugs me and tells me he loves me. I told him I liked how he was so funny.

I then asked each one some questions – not all the same but mostly. The questions were:

1) What is the best thing you like about our family?
2) When are you happiest?
3) If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
4) If you could change one thing about our family, what would it be?
5) My greatest fear is….

Some of the answers were quite interesting. For number 1 both Erika and Neil mentioned that they liked our family because we try hard to be a celestial family and we try to make it fun.

For number 2 Erika and Neil said they were happiest when they were with our family and we were all happy. Bryce said he is happiest when he is on a daddy-date with me.

For number 3 Erika said she would change herself so she would never fight with Bryce and Neil. Bryce said he would make himself so he could fly!

For number 4 Erika and Neil both mentioned changing our family so there would be no fighting. Neil also said he would make it so we all would go to heaven. Bryce said he would change our family so we would all love each other and that we all could fly.

For number 5 Erika said her greatest fear was doing things in front of a crowd. Neil said his greatest fear was being stolen! I didn’t ask Bryce that question.

After the questions I let them talk about whatever they wanted to. I was surprised and pleased when Erika confessed to me that she lied about being sick one day so she could stay home from school. She didn’t study for a geography bee and was so afraid of disappointing her teacher.

Then I had each child think of two goals for them to work on from now to the end of June and two goals for me to work on for the same time period. This is how they went which was an eye-opener for me:

Erika:

     Personal Goals:

     1. Practice piano one hour a day
     2. Work harder at being nice to her brothers – be a peace-maker

     Goals for Dad:

     1. Don’t get so mad so often
     2. Look more for the good and not the bad in Erika

Neil:

     Personal Goals:

     1. Practice piano ½ hour every day
     2. Do a backwards flip on the tramp

     Goals for Dad:

     1. Play baseball with Neil as much as I can after homework and chores
     2. Be nicer and not yell so much when the kids do things wrong

Bryce:

     Personal Goals:

     1. Talk nicer to my brothers and sisters
     2. Don’t play when it’s time to do chores

     Goals for Dad:

     1. Don’t get so mad when the kids do things wrong
     2. Spend more time playing with the kids

When my three oldest children tell me that I need to quit getting so mad I guess I better listen! I love my children so much and it was so good to meet with them. I feel so blessed!

(End of journal entry)

After reading my journal entry, it made me realize the value of taking the time to have a personal interview with your children on a regular basis. I hope this made you think about possibly doing the same with your own children. Let me know what you think.

Thank you.

Copyright © 2008 Garold N. Larson

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